Why must every generation think their folks are square
And no matter where their heads are, they know mom's ain't there
'Cause I swore when I was small that I'd remember when
I knew what's wrong with them that I was smaller then
Determined to remember all the cardinal rules
Like sun showers are legal grounds for cutting school
I know I have forgotten maybe one or two
And I hope that I recall them all before the baby's due
And I know he'll have a question or two
Like, "Hey, Pop, can I go ride my zoom?
It goes two hundred miles an hour suspended on balloons
And can I put a droplet of this new stuff on my tongue
And imagine frothing dragons while you sit and wreck your lungs?"
And I must be permissive, understanding of the younger generation
Then I'll know that all I've learned, my kid assumes
And all my deepest worries must be his cartoons
And still I'll try to tell them him all the things I've done
Relating to what he can do when he becomes a man
And still he'll stick his fingers in the fan
And "Hey, Pop, my girlfriend's only three
She's got her own videophone and she's taking LSD
And now that we're best friends she wants to give a bit to me
But what's the matter Daddy, how come you're turning green?
Can it be that you can't live up to your dreams?"