You And I Are So Awfully Different lyrics

Brian: We're gonna have to distract them. Follow my lead.

Both: You and I are so awfully diff'rent. Too awfully diff'rent, to ever be pals.

Stewie: Do you want to go first?

Brian: Yeah, I'll go...

Your favorite hero is the Marquis de Sade.

Stewie: Oh, you're one to talk...

You get a stiffy from Phylicia Rashad.

Brian: Oh, one time.

Stewie: I've a style flair. Just look at my hip hair.

Brian: Oh yeah, that's quite a nice 'do there.

Stewie: Oh, thanks.

Brian: For me to poop on! (doing an impression of Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog)

Stewie: What?

Brian: Oh, c'mon you look like Charlie Brown.

Stewie: Bite me, Snoopy.

Both: There's not - a whole lot - that we've got, to agree on.

Brian: 'Cause I love the strings of a classical score.

Stewie: And I like that singer who looks like a whore.

Brian: Ricky Martin?

Stewie: Love him.

Both: We're too different to ever be pals.

You and I are...

Locals: Doo-doo-doo

Both: So awfully different,

Locals: Doo-doo-doo

Both: Too awfully different,

Locals: Doo-doo-dooo

Both: To ever be pals.

Locals: Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-yoo, doo-doo

Brian: Your head's as massive as a meteorite.

Stewie: Oh, very funny.

You have a weenie like a Christmas tree light

Brian: I bet money, you'll marry a honey

Who's pretty and funny,

And her name will be Ted.

Stewie: Oh, a gay joke.

Brian: I just work with what cha' give me.

Both: You might think we're in sync,

But we stink, as a duo.

Brian: 'Cause you get a kick out of carnage and guts,

Stewie: And you get a kick out of stroking your...

Brian: Whoa, whoa, you can't say that on TV.

Stewie: What...ego?

Brian: Never mind...

Both: We're too different to ever be pals.