When I Get to Heaven lyrics

When I get to heaven,

I'm gonna shake God's hand

I'm gonna thank Him for more blessings

Than one man can stand

Then I'm gonna get a guitar

And start a rock-n-roll band

Check into a swell hotel

Ain't the afterlife grand?

Then I'm gonna get a cocktail

Vodka and ginger ale

Yeah, I'm gonna smoke a cigarette that's nine miles long

I'm gonna kiss that pretty girl on the tilt-a-whirl

'Cause this old man is goin' to town

Then as God as my witness

I'm getting back into show business

I'm gonna open up a nightclub called "The Tree of Forgiveness"

And forgive everybody ever done me any harm

Why, I might even forgive a few choice critics

Those syph'litic parasitics

Buy 'em a pint of Smithwicks

And smother 'em with my charm

'Cause then I'm gonna get a cocktail

Vodka and ginger ale

Yeah, I'm gonna smoke a cigarette that's nine miles long

I'm gonna kiss that pretty girl on the tilt-a-whirl

'Cause this old man is goin' to town

Yeah, when I get to heaven

I'm gonna take that wristwatch off my arm

What are you gonna do with time

after you've bought the farm?

Then I'm gonna look up my mom and dad,

And good old brother Doug

Why, I bet him and cousin Jackie are still cuttin' up a rug

And I wanna see all my mama's sisters

'Cause that's where all the love starts

I miss 'em all like crazy

Bless their little hearts

And I always will remember these words that my daddy said

He said: "Buddy, when you're dead, you're a dead pecker-head"

I hope to prove him wrong

That is, when I get to heaven

'Cause then I'm gonna have a cocktail

Vodka and ginger ale

Yeah, I'm gonna smoke a cigarette that's nine miles long

I'm gonna kiss that pretty girl on the tilt-a-whirl

'Cause this old man is goin' to town