Unspektakulär [English translation]

I don't take any drugs

Don't piss on every fence

I'm not actually homosexual

I've never tried to steal

Schnapps from the supermarket

There's no chance that I'll get on RTL

I am very, very unspectacular

Got no problems with cocaine or alcohol

I am really, seriously unspectacular

And all the same, I still feel pretty good

I can sing pretty well

I've never been on "Big Brother"

I don't go to the brothel very often

I pay my taxes mostly on time

I don't undress for "Playboy"

I also don't drive drunk, and not too fast

I am very, very unspectacular

Don't get pocket money like Helmut Kohl

I am really, seriously unspectacular

And despite that, I still feel pretty good

I don't step on the gas

Like the son of Uschi Glas

That guy's not really cool, but he acts like it

Westerwelle, Wowereit

Are totally gay, and–oh, sorry,

That's not interesting, and it's just as well

I am very, very unspectacular

I knock on my head, but it doesn't sound hollow

I am really, seriously unspectacular

And all the same, I still feel pretty good

Sometimes I get to know some dames

I'm not naming any names

And afterwards, they always say to me:

"You are very, very unspectacular

But yesterday with you was pretty cool!"

Yes, I'm very, very unspectacular

And thanks to that, I'm feeling pretty good