the History of Utah lyrics

He was a riverboat gambler

He was the son of the chief of police

He was a riverboat gambler

He was the son of the chief of police

He drove around in a Rambler

And he had a message from the chief

He drove around in a Rambler

He had a message from the chief

And old Joe did and said as he would

Took all the shopping carts in the mall

And took 'em to Utah, which was Zion

He built an empire out of the desert

Out of the dust and the sand, just like Las Vegas

But he never took the rap that the mafia did

And he thought the Indians were some lost 13 dudes

But he didn't treat 'em any better

And they were never on his side

They drove their pickup trucks out into the desert

Into a ditch along the side of the road

And acted like they were drunk all the time

And old Joe had 13 beady-eyed babies

One of whom I used to go to school with

He'd drive his car at 110 down the alleyway

Throwing cinderblocks at trash cans

And I declare on this occasion that I've never seen

this heaven, or this place any differently

But now and then I dream of the flying saucers,

and they're coming to take us away