As I walked home on Monday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a horse outside the door where my old horse should be.
So I called me wife and I says to her: “Will you kindly tell to me,
Who owns that horse outside the door where my old horse should be?”
“Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk, you silly old fool,
Still you can not see, that’s a lovely sow that me mother sent to me.”
It’s many a day I’ve traveled a hundred miles or more
But a saddle on a sow sure I never saw before.
And as I came home on a Tuesday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a coat behind the door where my old coat should be
So I called me wife and I says to her: “Would you kindly tell to me
Who owns that coat behind the door where my old coat should be?”
“Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk, you silly old fool,
Still you cannot see, that’s a woolen blanket that
me mother sent to me.”
Well, it’s many a day I’ve traveled a hundred miles or more
But buttons on a blanket sure I never saw before.
As I went home on a Wednesday night as drunk as drunk could be,
I saw a pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be
So I called his wife and I says to her: “Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns that pipe upon the chair where my old pipe should be?”
“Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk, you silly old fool,
Still you cannot see, that that’s a lovely tin whistle
that me mother sent to me.”
It’s many a day I’ve traveled a hundred miles or more
But tobacco in a tin whistle sure I never saw before.
And as I came home on a...Thursday? Thursday night
as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be
Well, I called me wife and I says to her: “Will you kindly tell to me
Who owns them boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be?”
“Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk, you silly old fool,
Still you cannot see, they’re two lovely geranium pots
me mother sent to me.”
Well, it’s plenty a day I’ve traveled a hundred miles or more
But laces in the geranium pots sure I never saw before.
Well, as I came home on Friday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a head upon the bed where my bald head should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her: “Would you kindly tell to me
Who owns that head upon the bed where my old head should be?”
“Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk, you silly old fool,
Still you cannot see, that’s a baby boy that me mother sent to me.”
Well, it’s many a day I’ve traveled a hundred miles or more
But a baby boy with his whiskers on sure I never saw before.
“Ah, you’re drunk, you’re drunk, you silly old fool,
Still you can not see, that’s a baby boy that me mother sent to me.”
Well, it’s many a day I’ve traveled a hundred miles or more
But a baby boy with his whiskers on sure I never saw before.
Well, a baby boy with his whiskers on sure I never saw before.