By the time you read these few lines,
I will already have put an end to this bitch of a disgraceful life!
I've had enough of suffering, enough of fleeing,
Enough of telling myself that I'm always depressed.*
I never knew how to lance the boil, I had no luck,
Love and its absences hurt like a bullet in the leg!
I write these words like a coward, I could have told you face-to-face,
But since I'm worthless**, I couldn't find the phrases
I tried to get up, but the bars K.O.'d me
Miserable in my own skin, I'd be better off higher up!
It's my fault, not yours, if I hang myself,
From the bottom of my heart, I love you and I'd be screwing up if I was lying! (?)
Tired, exhausted by living with no strength left,
If the judge is a knife, justice is a slit throat
I'm no longer sure what to say, perhaps,
I love you, I'm leaving you, but I have you in my heart!
[Refrain]:
Every day I wake up I feel like crying, every second I feel like praying
Everywhere I turn my purple dying brothers and sisters listen to what I'm saying
Since you left, my stomach's been aching
I have bad grades, I think I'm on the wrong track,
At home, Mum is constantly crying,
Tidying your room every day, we wait for you
Dad told me that life's like that
But if life's like that, I'll end up like you!
I wanted you to know that for me, your absence is a tragedy,
That the way you're leaving us is cruel.
I struggle to find the words, I've forgotten the notes,
My dear big brother, excuse the mistakes,
I'm going to send this letter to Paradise, without crying,
Like a man, hoping the angels will give it to you,
I really would have liked to see you one last time,
Your shadow will always be there behind me
Since you left, I've been doing bench squats assiduously,
Signed: your little brother who misses you!
[Refrain]
It's nice to read that you're waiting for me,
At this instant, I'm surely in a desert of white clouds!
Here, it's better, I sincerely believe, I don't want you dawdling
Pay attention here, I see you
For your pains and your tears I'm guilty,
Little bro***, my cowardice will only equal your courage!
I want you to understand that on earth, life crushed me,
Remember that my death is only the biggest of my mistakes!