Enter, enter
Welcome to my nest
They don't have to pay me anything, I invited them
This is on the house, they don't have to leave a tip
Today's recipe is the specialty of the house
"Carne asesina", and to calm the spices
A little bit of fried yuca with a mojito (garlic sauce)
("Do you have some Doritos?") No, fried yuca with mojito...
("Do you have some Coca-Cola?") No, but I have Perico wine
And this guy left quickly, he's so spoiled...
("Do you know who I am?") How? Is your name Juan?
("Do you know who I am?") You're asking if MY name is Juan?
("Yo querer Coca-Cola!") Well, look Juan...
What we have here is Cola Champagne and sweets.
But if you want some advice, Medalla is the best beer
("I just want Coca-Cola!") I told you my name is not Juan!
And all we have here is Cola Champagne!
Then, that black guy told me his name was Puff Daddy
And that he was the Sugar Daddy of all the Mack Daddies
He snapped back at me, his mouth like a megaphone
So I spat out my hot sauce and he instantly jumped to his feet
And in a sense, I told him that he was a spoiled brat
("Do you know who I am?") I told you my name is not Juan!
And there I hit him in the jaw and he sprinted away...
So quickly he cut corners, with a bump on the head like Mamadou Thiam
And I chased him all the way down San Sebastián street
I got to the Calle del Cristo where I took out my Sixto
El Sixto Escobar (boxer in PR), with the one-two jab
He began to fly like a kite
He started to spit watered-down pee through his pants
Brown sugar started to drip from his pants
Poop dripped through his tights
Olive-colored poop; yeah, olive-colored poop.
What fancy people shit from only eating dishes
That cost $50.00 or more.
There are loads of pigs (I’m not a pig!)
There are loads of hams (I’m not a ham!)
Even if they offer me a million...
I tell him no.
There are loads of suckers.
There are loads of pigs (I’m not a pig!)
There are loads of hams (I’m not a ham!)
If Puff Daddy offers me a million
I say no.
There are loads of suckers.
Don’t believe that my race is small enough to get rid of
If we don’t slam dunk, we go for the layup
And all of the gringos like you can go with your cameras to the Garita [del Diablo] (a historical guard lookout)
You don’t have to make an appointment, you are our guests
"Say cheese!", and a smile for the beach
So the sharks can rip off your heels
Because here in Puerto Rico, we are the toughest.
And after that, Puff Daddy returned to New York
A little distant, less of a man, with a new nickname
P. Diddy, Mister P. Diddy, here is your bib
So you can slurp up a little Puerto Rican milk
So you think twice before you fight with us
Because when you come here, don’t make funny faces, don’t bring signs
That could cost you all your hair
So if you don’t want to have your nose shaken
Think before you mess with a “cacique” (Native Puerto Rican chief)
This is not Mozambique, this is Puerto Rico
Here, you’ll smash into the pavement
Here, everyone wears chest armor
Here in Puerto Rico everyone is a mulatto
Here, even if you’re white, you’re black.
Here you show respect, or you get stabbed.
Here you show respect, or you get stabbed.
Don’t piss me off, don’t make me talk shit.
I said it, my bad, but it’s because I don’t hang with gringos.
I’ve got them going, back and forth, back and forth
I stand up for myself, even though I’m outnumbered.
There are loads of pigs (I’m not a pig!)
There are loads of hams (I’m not a ham!)
Even if they offer me a million...
I tell him no.
There are loads of suckers
There are loads of pigs (I’m not a pig!)
There are loads of hams (I’m not a ham!)
If Puff Daddy offers me a million
I tell him no.
There are loads of suckers.