On ne peut rien faire quand on est petit [English translation]

You can't do anything when you're little

Enough is enough, all these restrictions!

Go and get your darts from your gun back

From the neighbour's forehead

Don't dye the dog's hair

With the bottle of china ink

Let granny rest in peace

Her armchair isn't a ship

You can't dismantle her

Your grandmother isn't a robot

Enough already, where have you seen

Anyone fill the sink with wine

To find out if our turtle

Knew how to swim in sauvignon

And what is that obnoxious smell?

How many times must I remind you

That our microwave oven

Doesn't read DVDs?

{Chorus:}

You can't do anything when you're little

Enough is enough, all these restrictions!

The day will come when I'll have all the rights

And that day, I'll be the law

Is every day "April fools' days"

you know, really, I've enough on my back already 1

Your lego fills the car

And you Playmobil in the fridge

The hamster is getting obese

Since you've been bottle feeding him

From the mayonnaise tube

I'm not sure that he likes it

Playing doctor is no good

And frankly you overdo it

Don't use you cousin to practise

Open heart surgery

It's enough to make one faint

That's the cherry on the cake:

He's drawn a little man

In Nutella on my coat

{Chorus}

How do you explain this:

I found the remote control

For the telly in the cat litter box

There are times, I swear, you wonder!

Will you leave that cat in peace

Look at me that poor beast

Don't make scoubidous

With Pépette's whiskers 2

What is your sister doing in the cherry tree?

What's that "She's in orbit"?

How many times must I tell you

Justine is not a satellite!

We're only at peace when you sleep

And even then the last time

We found a side of pork

When we slipped under the sheets

{x2:}

You can't do anything when you're little

Enough is enough, all these restrictions!

The day will come when I'll have all the rights

And that day, I'll be the law

Oh yes? You sure?

Yes, on that day I'll be the king

Yes, on that day I'll do anything!

Don't do this, don't do that!

You're going to fall, what have you been told?

Don't do this, don't do that!

Listen to what your father tell you!

Don't do this, don't do that!

Tidy your room, turn off the computer!

Listen to what your mother tells you!

It's true what I say, you can't do anything!

1. The april fools' day tradition is to pin a paper fish on the victim's back. This makes for a pun in the next line's "I've had a back full"2. a kind of loom band, like a friendship bracelet