refrain:
If I could I would shout up to the sky
Let the wind carry my voice far away
I can see it but can not comprehend it
They chase false demons
Today that hurts, hell is waiting
But tomorrow I'll laugh while I pray
Thinking this is my fate, because I deserve this
I deserve this
Trust me on this, it bothers me more if I didn't keep my word
The smart one knows when to yield, but I suffered, while I played the stubborn donkey1
I believed in the plan, when it was promising, but it turned to ash in a day
And looking at the bottom of a glass, I learned, that all it leaves is anger
Didn't I give enough smiles? Enough happy moments?
Say that I didn't care about you and that I didn't make your day
Had I too many silly principles, I didn't make enough serious plans?
We didn't have an understanding? That's why our moments together are lost?
Tell me, why did you strike out those three letters, was it easier that way?2
You knew, you didn't have to shed tears for me
And you don't have to go out on a limb for me, while the music is alive in me
I did what felt good and I didn't need a permission
refrain:
If I could I would shout up to the sky
Let the wind carry my voice far away
I can see it but can not comprehend it
They chase false demons
Today that hurts, hell is waiting
But tomorrow I laugh in my prayers
Thinking this is my fate, because I deserve this
I deserve this
Ask anybody, if they know my name
And ask anybody, if it's any use to me!
Ask anybody, what they think about me
and ask that person, if we were ever buddies!
And ask that too, if we were ever drunk together
or numbed ourselves together in some other way!
Ask that person, if I know what work is
or, ask what do I feel, when someone is singing my songs!
Make him/her say, what would he/she do differently, than I thus far
Would he/she want nothing, or would he/she ask for money, but how much?
Would he/she be virtuous, or a common hooker, his/her father raised him/her or the street!
If you got the answers, than grab that rod
and break it above my head3and let the all knowing, inside dirty, outside clean monkeys see it clearly, if you need me, don't worry, I'm still here working hard!
refrain:
If I could I would shout up to the sky
Let the wind carry my voice far away
I can see it but can not comprehend it
They chase false demons
Today that hurts, hell is waiting
But tomorrow I laugh in my prayers
Thinking this is my fate, because I deserve this
I deserve this
I was born a nobody, I became somebody
All my life all I wished for was an honest word
I was floating with the breeze, I lived on the concrete of public places
I damned the idols, I only feared the name of God
People still slander (spit on) me to this day, but that's not my fault anymore
The castle is in ruins in me too, maybe words are just a waste at this point
You can't see into my soul, a glass filled to the top
What I was condemned for, half of it is true at the most
refrain:
If I could I would shout up to the sky
Let the wind carry my voice far away
I can see it but can not comprehend it
They chase false demons
Today that hurts, hell is waiting
But tomorrow I laugh in my prayers
Thinking this is my fate, because I deserve this
I deserve this
refrain:
If I could I would shout up to the sky
Let the wind carry my voice far away
I can see it but can not comprehend it
They chase false demons
Today that hurts, hell is waiting
But tomorrow I laugh in my prayers
Thinking this is my fate, because I deserve this
I deserve this
1. In Hungary, donkeys are associated with stubbornness.2. Don't worry if you don't get this, I think it's a hidden message to the person this song was written to.3. To break a rod above somebody's head is to condemn him/her. I don't know if the English language has this idiom or not. Supposedly in older times a rod was broken in a trial when a death sentence was given.