As I did walk by Hampstead Fair
I came upon Mother Goose
So I turned her loose
She was screaming.
And a foreign student said to me:
Was it really true there are elephants and lions too
in Piccadilly Circus?
Walked down by the bathing pond
To try and catch some sun.
Saw at least a hundred schoolgirls sobbing
Into hankerchiefs as one.
I don't believe they knew
I was a schoolboy.
And a bearded lady said to me,
If you start your raving and your misbehaving,
You'll be sorry.
Then the chicken-fancier came to play
With his long red beard (and his sister's weird:
She drives a lorry).
Laughed down by the putting green,
I popped `em in their holes.
Four and twenty labourers were labouring,
digging up their gold.
I don't believe they knew
That I was Long John Silver.
Saw Johnny Scarecrow make his rounds
In his jet-black mac (which he won't give back)
Stole it from a snow man.
As I did walk by Hampstead Fair
I came upon Mother Goose
So I turned her loose
She was screaming.
Walked down by the bathing pond
To try and catch some sun.
Must have been at least a hundred schoolgirls sobbing
Into hankerchiefs as one.
I don't believe they knew
I was a schoolboy.