Mio cuggino [English translation]

My cousin1 my cousin

My cousin my cousin

My cousinmycousinmycousinmycousinmycousin

mycousinmycousinmycousinmycousinmycousin...

My cousin told me

that he once crashed his motobike

- miiiii 2 -

my cousin my cousin.

My cousin told me

that afterwards he removed his helmet

and his head cracked open,

my cousin my cousin.

My cousin removed his helmet,

my cousin - his head cracked open.

My cousin told me

he once found a dog on the beach

but it was actually a rat.

- I can't believe it! My cousin too! -

my cousin my cousin.

My cousin told me

he once slept with a gal

who then wrote on his mirror

"Welcome to AIDS"

- same story, same story, same story, same story -

my cousin, poor thing,

welcome to AIDS

My cousin - rat dog

my cousin - welcome to AIDS.

My cousin my cousin

my cousin is respected

and friends with everybody.

My cousin did this and that,

my cousin protects me

when people come to give me a beating

because I call my cousin.

Rather, I call to 3 my cousin

My cousin told me

he once saw a braless girl

- stighidin, stighidin, stish stidun aaah -

my cousin my cousin.

My cousin told me

he once was at a club

where he met a gal -

he has no memories of what happened next

and in the end he woke up in a ditch,

soaked, and one of his kidneys was missing,

my cousin my cousin.

My cousin told me

he knows a secret punch

and if he hits you you die after three days,

my cousin my cousin.

My cousin told me

that when he was kid he died once.

My cousin my cousin

my cousin is wanted 4

and friends with everybody.

My cousin did this and that,

my cousin protects me

when people come to give me a beating

because I call my cousin.

Rather, you know what,

I call to my cousin.

My cousin my cousin

my cousin is alarming

and speaks in burps:

"Hi, how are you?"

My cousin did this and that,

the bumper cars and the swing ride,

my cousin the villain 5;

but he is a product of the mind.

Rather, he produced some mint

but he didn't have a license

so the jailed him.

Ue!

Ok, I agree, free Mandela,

free Valpreda 6 and everybody else,

but free my cousin too.

Rather, free to 7 my cousin too

Na na nai, my cousin na na nai,

na na nai, my cousin na na nai.

I can't believe it! Same same story!

Maybe we are related!

What's your surname?

Just to be sure he is the same person.

Your cousin too, when he had

haemorroids, pulled the cork

and injured the nurse?

Actually, I know the nurse

because she assisted me when as a kid

I was shot at,

but I didn't die.

They hit the spider

that was coming out at that very moment

from the cornstalk dracaena. 8

So, what did I do?

With my friend the white crocodile

from the New York sewers

we went to the ER

to visit some friends

who were there to have stuff removed from their bodies, such as

oranges, bottles, door handles, doors,

dogs, worlds, until at some point,

guess who's there?

I can't believe it!

My favorite plastic surgeon in the ER!

What a day! What a day!

1. Correct Italian spelling: cugino; "cuggino" gives the idea of how the word is pronounced in Southern Italy 2. First half of a Sicilian expletive, something like "What the..." 3. Verb construction common in some dialects of Southern Italy 4. also: sought-after 5. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sceneggiata 6. Italian anarchist: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pietro_Valpreda 7. same construction as before 8. Urban legend: allegedly, a shipment of dracaena plants sold in Italy was infested with deadly spiders