Jeunes femmes et vieux messieurs [English translation]

You who have one foot in the grave

Careful where you put your hand

If it slips if it falls

On a bitch of a woman it’s not too clever

Young women and old gentlemen

If she has no love it doesn’t matter1

Young women and old gentlemen

He has enough love for two

If you no longer have hair on your head

What do you need to worry about

You’ll get your strength back 2

When you go mess up her hair 3

Young women and old gentlemen

If he has no more hair it doesn’t matter

Young women and old gentlemen

She has enough hair for two

You walking down Pigalle Street

Pay attention to your diet

When you go back up to Halles

The thread of the onion soup 4

Young women and old gentlemen

If he’s on a diet it doesn’t matter

Young women and old gentlemen

She has enough appetite for two

But before crumpling her underwear

Laying her on the divan

In order to be comfortable with her

You’ll need her on your will and testament

Young women and old gentlemen

If she’s skint it doesn’t matter

Young women and old gentlemen

He has enough cash for two

When she tells you that she loves you

Pay close attention to your heart

If she lives on the fourth floor

And the elevator’s broken down

Young women and old gentlemen

At that age it doesn’t matter anymore

Young women and old gentlemen

He can wait a day or two

1. All through this song Ils and Elles are used for they(masculine) and they (feminine) this doesn’t work in English so I have switched to the singular he/she which makes sense for this song2. Reprendre du poil de la bête - Take a hair of the dog, as in the expression ‘a hair of the dog that bit you’ This is full of possible double entendres! 3. or remove her hat - either works.4. Not sure of the significance of this...