Fancy meeting you here!
It's me, Nathalie
Don't you remember me?
Sure you do
We were together in high school
Sure, I changed
Now I have kids, a husband
So what? Surprised?
I was not meant for
an orderly life.
I was lost,
my husband found me.
I was one of those
who never say no.
The loose girls
whose name is soon forgotten
I was not the pretty one
just her friend,
the one you hardly see,
the what's-her-name.
I was two years older
maybe two years too many
and I liked boys
maybe a bit too much
Of course you had won
scores of hearts
though nobody had ever witnessed
one of your party affairs.
For many of you
I'm the first time,
one of these priceless things
or at least not too cheap
I was not one of those
who are to be courted.
I was one of those
who already consented.
You came by me
but the next day
you would not be seen
holding my hand
As you kissed me
inconspicuously
I knew it was for fear
of being seen with me
So I closed my eyes
ever so tightly
while you kept yours
watchfuly open
I kept saying to myself
"don't get involved"
while you thought
"don't get caught"
But once in my arms
your breathless whispers
they were mine,
all mine.
Snug against you,
breathing through your hair,
I know, I declare
that you loved me a bit.
Some girls fall in love,
it's noble, it elevates them
As for me, it felt
like falling from a chair.
So full of yourselves now that you had done it
you gave lectures,
dissecting me like a mouse,
donating my body to science.
I was an inspiration
for the smutty jokes
that helped you feel like men,
you little men, you cavemen
Letting slip from your lips
a single tender word
was like admitting
your worst weakness.
You the bullies
chatting like old pros
forgot that, in my arms,
you did not look so proud.
And the other girls,
the treacherous goody-goodies
would have shaved my hairs off
in another time.
The girls used to
being pampered
know nothing of the solitude
that can't be consoled.
You came by me
but the next day
you would not be seen
holding my hand