Nights in the muni'[cipal] pool,
And after with the cops in jail.
The kiss in my parents’ cedar closet,
In a heart our two names we carved.
Today, "best friends forever";
[lit. forever blood brothers]
The next day, I've no clue who you are.
Three hours in the taxi ‘round and 'round
[lit. around the block]
Cause I thought the driver looked so hot.
Three girls in away-team garb
At the home team’s side, midfield.
[lit. in Bavarian-red at the South corner at Hamburg's soccer team home field]
The oh-so-candid note to my boss
The cheek-to-cheek dance with his wife.
[lit. close-dancing]
A silly game of truth-or-dare
Turns Spring Break into my honeymoon.
[lit. During vacation and my wedding afterward]
Latin as a post-grad course,
This hair-do, my record contract.
All this would never have happened
All this would never have happened
All this would never have happened
... with no Prosecco.
Sunday morning, seventeen past ten,
Woken up by the telephone,
I'm nude but my boots are still on,
My senses have yet to return.
[lit. "are all out of sync."]
All from yesterday that I recall
Is though I were in some wild dream.
[lit. came to me in a frenzy/euphoria.]
I yelled, “Viv la revolution!
Storm the stage - This is my song!”
[or maybe "Tear down the house"]
My friend on the answering machine shouts:
“Hey, just what drugs were you ‘on’?”
[lit. "what (drug) did you take?"]
He says my bra is on eBay.
And however did I get home?
Heavens! Ass! How'd I get my lip pierced?
[n.b. "lip" is shown in the video, not in lyrics]
And what about this serpent tattoo?
And whose things lie here on my bed?
And who the devil are you?
All this would never have happened
All this would never have happened
All this would never have happened
... with no Prosecco.