Человек Из Кемерова [Chelovek iz Kemerova] [English translation]

I had a number of problems.

Have I ventured a great deal too far?

The lowest bottoms of the lowest hell

Didn’t look deep enough as they are.

And then I’ve called my mother,

And she was right saying so,

She gave her answer: “You have to place a call

To that fellow from Kemerovo".

He stings with his words like De Niro,

His arguments make you sick.

The chance you can rip him off is zero,

The underground escapes is his trick.

If heavens will plummet to earth,

If all grass will cease to grow,

He will come and silently right all wrong,

Oh, that fellow from Kemerovo.

Adam is a fugitive,

Abel is trapped inside the cellular net,

And Noah didn’t finish what he was building,

Got wasted, fell face in the mud, all wet.

The written history of mankind

Wouldn’t be so misaligned,

If they would find time and senses to converse

With that fellow from Kemerovo.

I received one phone call from Kiev,

Another from Kathmandu.

They called to open a plenum session,

I explained to them what they should do.

I will drink tonight more water: a liter or two,

So at dawn my head would be straight and whole,

Since I have an intention to drink

With that fellow from Kemerovo.