亂舞春秋 [Chaotic Dance] [Luàn wǔ chūnqiū] [English translation]

That chaotic era, government too corrupt, calamities brought on by men caused natural disasters from above,

Eastern Han Dynasty1 collapsed and fell in the period of a day,

People dissected and split the map of China into three chunks,

Read about the history of the rise and fall of The Three Kingdoms2, want to go take a look for a clearer understanding,

Just taking a look and will come back immediately, kieng kieng kiang kiang,

Knives, swords, sticks, and clubs, I casually say, it turns out there really is something as outrageous as a time machine,

Travelling through time is fun but arrogant, what if I go and cannot return, what to do,

To tell the truth, I'm a little nervous, ah ah

Great state, I stand at the edge of the cloud, slowly traveling towards the direction of the Central Plains3

Scattered villages, Chang An4 is amidst the chaos of war

Looking at the sky, seeing the Big Dipper falling into the horizon

Momentarily, heroes appear as if they're ghosts.

Bah! Nobody is satisfied with anyone, I'm a tortoise and you're a turtle, la la la la la la la la

Evil beasts disturb mortal order, the smell of blood attack like tides

My little life almost had no continuation, luckily for the time machine, I thank you

Demons start resurfacing from hell, rebel soldiers attack like wildfire

My five sense organs almost left the body, luckily for the time machine, I thank you

Cao's5 Kingdom of Wei6 has fierce and ambitious heroes, Kingdom of Shu Han7 has many talented people, Eastern Wu's8 soldiers are strange

Qi Xing Lian Huan9 failed, Zhu Ge Liang's10 Mandate of Heaven11 doesn't come

These books have it all recorded, it's not me talking nonsense

Wait till the East flops, then I'll say hi to you

With a knife in mouth, talk until the folk songs are worn down

Grievances of a thousand years, canceled out with a stroke of a pen

Life is careless and I bend down

History's reincarnation, I'll forget it in a flash

Yellow Turban12 thief, don't you squabble

Wo13, our grandma is beating strands of noodles with water

Put down the knife if you wish to eat until full

Go find the Emperor and beg

Yellow Turban thief, don't you squabble

Wo our grandma burn firewood to cook dumplings

Put down the knife if you wish to eat until full

Go find the Emperor and beg

Hello? I'm singing, chicken rice. Eh! Add an egg.

1. Eastern Han Dynasty: 25-220AD2. The Three Kingdoms: 220-265AD; a period of disunion/civil war in Chinese history; consisted of 3 co-existing/warring kingdoms: Wei, Shu Han, and Wu, who each tried to unify China under their rule3. Central Plains: Region around the Yellow River, colloquially refers to Mainland China4. Chang An: Capital of China during the Han and Tang dynasties5. Cao: Ruler of Kingdom of Wei, Caocao was a military general during the Eastern Han and was involved in cracking down the Yellow Turban Uprising; his son Caopi established Wei6. Kingdom of Wei: 220-265AD; one of The Three Kingdom, located in north China; it was the strongest of the three7. Kingdom of Shu Han: 221-263AD; one of The Three Kingdoms; located in western China8. Eastern Wu: 222-280AD; one of The Three Kingdoms; located in eastern China9. Qi Xing Lian Huan: may refer to some type of war strategy10. Zhu Ge Liang (181-234AD): chief military advisor to Liu Bei, ruler of Kingdom of Shu Han; his death marked the downfall of Shu Han; typically thought of as one of the most brilliant minds in Chinese history11. Mandate of Heaven: the belief that each ruler of China was divined from above, making their rule legitimate; when an Emperor loses the "mandate" it means The Heavens no longer sees him as The Son of Heaven and fit to rule, perhaps due to ignorance or not being virtuous enough12. Yellow Turbans: rebel group that carried out the Yellow Turban Uprising that eventually led to the collapse of the Han Dynasty13. Wo: old term referring to Japan