♂ We used to be lovers, but then…you left me, adducing no plausible motivations.
♀ No [...], that’s not true. You don’t understand the feminine world, my strong feminine sensibility contrasts with your coarse male materialism.
♂ Nonetheless…
♂ I love you, dear.
♀ I feel confused.
♂ I love you, dear.
♀ I need to stay alone for a while.
♂ I love you, dear.
♀ I just left a guy after a three years' relation.
♂ I love you, dear.
♀ I don’t want to feel tied down.
♂ I love you, dear.
♂ Stay home.
♀ I want to be free.
♂ Go out with whoever you like.
♀ You never care of what I do.
♂ I’d like to fondle your boobs.
♀ Pig.
♂ I’d never touch you, not even with a flower. 1
♀ Fag.
♂ I do drugs, I’m blasphemous, I’m violent with the kids and I don’t give a fuck about you.
♀ I love you.
♂ I work my ass out fourteen hours straight for you and I do give a fuck about you.
♀ I leave you for a drug addict who doesn’t do shit for all day, blasphemous and violent with the kids.
♂ I put the condom on.
♀ I have a dream of maternity.
♂ I have a dream of paternity.
♀ Put the condom on.
I love you, dear […]
♂ I stay home.
♀ You oppress me.
♂ I go out.
♀ This house is not a hotel.
♂ I’ll rub an ice cube soaked in Cointreau on your belly, and then I’ll fuck you blindfolded.
♀ I’m not a whore.
♂ How about in the classic position, you lying down and me on top.
♀ What a bore.
♂ Said the cow to the mule.
♀ Your ass stinks today.
♂ Said the mule to the cow.
♀ I just took a shit.
I love you, dear […]
♂ And now, let’s join our bodies in the supreme exhilaration typical of the idyllic love.
♀ No! Because when I was thirteen my cousin has shown it to me and since then I’m traumatized, but we can hug all night doing nothing, it’s gonna be wonderful anyway.
♂ How about I fuck your ass hard?
♀ Come on, seriously now.
♂ Would you like to come out with me tomorrow evening?
♀ I’m a bit tired and maybe I’ve already got an appointment.
♂ Well, that’s fine, I’ll see my friends.
♀ I’m free.
♂ This relation should be about sex.
♀ I need to be loved.
♂ This relation should be about love.
♀ Let’s shag.
♂ This is how I am.
♀ Try to change.
♂ Here, I’m changed.
♀ You’re not the same man anymore.
♂ You are mine.
♀ The uterus is mine. 2
♂ Here’s the money for the fur coat.
♀ Here’s the uterus.
Hooray for love!
1. an Italian adage says "you don't touch women, not even with a flower", with "touch" meaning "beat up, punch".2. a popular feminist slogan from the '60s