[Intro]
Eminem has a full line of chainsaws
Eminem, Eminem, Eminem, Eminem, Eminem, Eminem
Marshall Mathers, Eminem, the rapper Eminem
"Who can say for sure? Perhaps a frontal lobotomy would be the answer. If science could operate on this distorted brain and put it to good use, society would reap a great benefit."
[Verse 1]
I walk around like a space cadet, place your bets
Who's likely to become a serial killer? Case of Tourettes
Fuck, fuck-fuck, can't take the stress
I make a mess as the day progresses
Angry and take it out on the neighbors' hedges
Like this is how I'll cut your face up, bitches
With these hedge-trimmin' scissors with razor edges
Imagination's dangerous
It's the only way to escape this mess
And make the best of this situation, I guess
'Cause I feel like a little bitch
This predicament's despicable, I'm sick of just gettin' pushed
It's ridiculous, I look like a frickin' wuss
A pussy, this kid just took my stick of licorice
And threw my sticker books in a picker bush
I wanna kick his tush, but I was six and shook
This fucker was twelve and was six foot, with a vicious hook
He hit me, I fell; I got back up, all I did was book
Now there's using your head, Momma always said—
[Hook]
If you had a brain, you'd be dangerous
A brain, you'd be dangerous
I'ma prove you wrong
Momma, I'ma grow one day to be famous
And I'ma be a pain in the anus
I'ma be the bomb
I'ma use my head as a weapon
Find a way to escape this insaneness
Momma always said
"Son, if you had a brain, you'd be dangerous."
Guess it pays to be brainless
[Verse 2]
Fast forward some years later, a teenager; this is fun, sweet
I just got jumped twice in one week, it's complete
It's usually once a month, this is some feat
I've accomplished, they've stomped me
Into the mud, gee, for what reason you stumped me?
But how do you get the shit beat out of you
Beat down and be upbeat when you don't have nothing?
No valid shot at life, chance to make it or succeed
'Cause you're doomed from the start
It's like you grew up on Jump Street, from jump street
But if I could just get my head out my ass
I could accomplish any task, practicin' trash-talkin'
In a trance locked in my room
Yeah, but I got some plans, Momma
These damn rhymes are falling out of my pants pocket
I can't stop it, and I'm starting to blend in more
In school this shit helps for sure
I'm getting more self-assured than I've ever been before
Plus no one picks on me anymore
I done put a stop to that, threw my first punch – end of story
Still, in my skull’s a vacant empty void
Been usin’ it more as a bin for storage
Take some inventory: in this gourd there’s a Ford engine
Door hinge, syringe, an orange
An extension cord, and a Ninja sword
Not to mention four linchpins, an astringent stored
Ironin’ board, a bench, a wrench, an ORU
Winch, an attention whore
Everything but a brain
But dome's off the fuckin' chain like an independent store
Something's wrong with my head
Just think if I had a brain in it, thank God that I don't
'Cause I'd probably be Dahmer, 'cause Momma always said—
[Hook]
If you had a brain, you'd be dangerous
A brain, you'd be dangerous
I'ma prove you wrong
Momma, I'ma grow one day to be famous
And I'ma be a pain in the anus
I'ma be the bomb
I'ma use my head as a weapon
Find a way to escape this insaneness
Momma always said
"Son, if you had a brain, you'd be dangerous."
Guess it pays to be brainless
[Bridge]
Now my mom goes wahm-wahm-wahm
'Cause I'm not that smart, but I'm not dumb
I was on a bottom of the pile, gettin' stomped
But somehow I came out on top
[Verse 3]
I told you one day, I said they'd have that red carpet rolled out, yo
I'm nice, y'all, fuck it, I'm out cold
Now everywhere I go they scream out go
I'm 'bout to clean house, yo
I'm Lysol, now I'm just household
Outsold the sell-outs
Freak the hell out Middle America, hear 'em yell out
In terror, they were so scared
And those kids just about belted out
Whatever spouted or fell out
Of my smart aleck mouth, it was so weird
Inappropriate? So be it, I don't see it
Maybe one day when the smoke clears, it won't be as
Motherfuckin' difficult, ch-yeah
'Til then, hopefully you little homos
Get over your fears and phobias
It's okay to be scared straight
They said I provoke queers 'til emotions evoke tears
My whole career's a stroke of sheer genius
Smoke and mirrors, tactical, practical jokes, yeah
You motherfuckin' (insert insult here)
Who the fuck woulda thunk that one little ol' MC'd
Be able to take the whole culture and re-upholstery it?
And boy, they did flock; can't believe this little hick locked
This hip-hop shit in his hip pocket, and still the shit got
That white-trash traffic in gridlock
Shit hoppin' like six blocks
From a Kid Rock/Insane Clown Posse concert in mid Oc-
-tober, and God forbid I see a wizard
And get a brain in my titanium cranium, y'all, 'cause
I'll turn into the Unabomber, Momma always said—
[Hook]
If you had a brain, you'd be dangerous
A brain, you'd be dangerous
I'ma prove you wrong
Momma, I'ma grow one day to be famous
And I'ma be a pain in the anus
I'ma be the bomb
I'ma use my head as a weapon
Find a way to escape this insaneness
Momma always said
"Son, if you had a brain, you'd be dangerous."
Guess it pays to be brainless
[Outro]
Insaneness ain't even a word, you stupid fuck!
Neither is ain't