Афанасий Никитин Буги [Хождение За Три Моря 2] [Afanasiy Nikitin bugi [Khozhdenie za tri morya 2]] [English translation]

We left McDougal in the middle of the winter,

My girlfriend from Toliatti, myself from Kostroma

We'd have survived till summer and then- who cares

But the cocaine had 8 grams of toothpaste powder

So we had to move through the hatch

Using joints for light

She decided to go to Mecca, I said goodbye.

Can't remember how it happened, whose wind blew in my mouth

I was following Kastaneda, ended up in merchant fleet

Where all sailors wear skirts, cabin boy has a knife in his mouth

Then we staid in Ulan-Bator port for shipping

I rushed into datzan, I want to retreat

Then Lagerfeld is in front of me

And I'm on Oxford street

With me is botswain Pahsa, the man who holds fashion

His jacket is Yamamoto and his pants are Comme de Garcon

The runs in this woman from the painting of Monet

And shouts: we have four thirds quickly all follow me

They have no money for a taxi, had to sell their coat

I swear no one has seen such thing in Kostroma before

At first it was fun, then spleen came down

While we were licking slime from lizards' backs

The flat was filled with pagan relics to the brim

I translated all Tzoy's songs from Urdu to Latin

When I drank everything they kept between their window frames

I sat on the first subway to Tiruvanantapuram

And so we're rushing through the desert, train is creaking and bleating,

Our driver, old bluesman-transvestite is taking us though bleak stars

Weird shit is happening all around us, closer and further away

Maybe dances of steelmakers, maybe women's fight in mud

When I had my twenty fifth nervous breakdown

I threw my feet to Kathmandu through the Large Barrier Reef

And so I haven't shaved for seven weeks, ate shrooms for eight days

I started looking like a man of heroic fate

Shamans and doctors argue how I managed to survive

But I learned Swahili and changed cultural myth

When aliens enter the village, I will throw them in the cell

We, Russians abroad do not need any foreigners.