How The Hell Do Harrison Ford’s Glasses Stay On His Face Like This?

What I like about the show Shrinking is that it’s almost exactly as good as it should be. There’s a high bar here with the talent involved. It’s led by the team behind Ted Lasso (Brett Goldstein and Bill Lawrence), it’s got a cast filled with comedy veterans (Jason Segel, Jessica Williams, Ted McGinley, Christa Miller, etc.), and it’s got an interesting premise (therapists whose personal lives are a huge mess). It looks good on paper and it is good in practice, which is not nothing from a creative standpoint. It’s not taking the easy route, either. The show does a little two-step over and around the line between comedy and drama that can be tough to cross without tripping and wiping out in front of everyone. Check it out if you haven’t yet. I think you might dig it.

And when you check it out, you will probably notice something else that I probably should have mentioned in the first paragraph: Harrison Ford is on the show. Like, the Harrison Ford. Indiana Jones. Han Solo. The fugitive from The Fugitive. He plays a cranky older therapist named Paul and he is an absolute delight. There was one episode where he and Jessica Williams sang along to “Every Morning” by Sugar Ray in a car, which you need to see. (Click here, scroll down.) One time his character got very high on edibles and went to a party. That was also just about exactly as good as you would expect it to be, which is to say “very.” It’s a good time.

And that is the end of the part of our discussion where we cover trivial things like the quality of the show and how wild it is that Harrison Ford is absolutely killing it on a television series in 2023. We have important things to get to. I do, at least. There is one particular aspect of the show that is driving me crazy. I need to know how Harrison Ford’s glasses stay on his face like this…

and like this…

I have worn glasses my entire adult life. I understand the physics of resting them on top of your head, where your hair is. I get sliding them down your nose to look over the top of them. But I have tried to do this — resting them in the dead center of my forehead — a dozen times in the last few days, including once again just now, and gravity simply will not allow them to stay there. They donk back onto my nose immediately. One time they fell off my face entirely.

“But Brian,” you say, with condescension dripping off of all three of those syllables. “He’s leaning back in both of those screencaps. Maybe that’s the reason they stay in place.”

Okay, smart guy. Explain this…

… and this.

No leaning there. Sitting pretty straight up. Glasses still locked into place in the center of his forehead.

“Okay, Brian,” you say again, like a snot. “But he is raising his eyebrows a little in both of these. He’s scrunching up his face, creating a ledge for them to rest on. It’s not that outlandish, really.”

Oh yeah

WELL HOW ABOUT THIS

HE IS LEANING OVER.

HE IS BENDING FORWARD TO POUR COFFEE.

THOSE THINGS REMAIN LOCKED IN PLACE IN DEFIANCE OF REASON AND SCIENCE.

AND IT HAPPENED AGAIN.

Pretty quiet now, Mr. Glasses Expert. Not hearing a lot out of you after two screencaps of screen legend Harrison Ford hunched over tables and counters with his glasses resting on his forehead despite biology and physics both telling us they should have slid right off his face and splashed into his jet-black coffee. Nothing to say

“Well, it’s hard to tell from the still images,” you mutter, flailing. “Maybe he just limits his head movement when they’re up there and h-…”

Oh, buddy. Did you really think I would come into this without GIFs Like this hasn’t been eating at me to the degree I have an entire folder full of images on my computer Oh, I have GIFs. Two of them. Look at this guy doing rapid movements side-to-side in a way that should easily dislodge those spectacles.

“Yeah, but side-to-side wouldn’t affect gravity. That would be more of a rapid movement up or d-“

RAPID MOVEMENT UP OR DOWN, YOU SAY

It does not make sense to me. It’s to the point now where it almost takes me out of the show. Two characters will be having a nice little conversation in the break room about something in their personal lives and Harrison Ford will walk in with his glasses magically hovering mid-brow and I’ll start scribbling equations on the window like an unwell mathematician in a movie about my personal struggles. People are starting to worry about me.

Anyway, after a lot of thought (too much, probably) (definitely), I have come up with three potential explanations for how Harrison Ford’s glasses stay on his forehead like this:

I’m leaning toward the last one. For now. I will continue to monitor this situation.