Brad Pitt Wants The Straight Pride Parade Supporters To Stop Calling Him Their Mascot

There are some great events going on this Pride month… and some not so great. A small group of definitely-not-insecure men obtained a permit for a Straight Pride Parade in Boston following the same route as Boston’s Gay Pride Parade. Plenty of jokes have been made about the event, but few people noticed that the organizers’ website declared, “The Straight Community has adopted Brad Pitt as our mascot. Congratulations to Mr. Pitt for being the face of this important civil rights movement.” Brad Pitt noticed.

According to TMZ, representatives of Brad Pitt have reached out to Straight Pride Parade organizers to request they take his name out of their mouths. Reportedly, “further action could be taken” if they continue using his name and likeness.

Pitt isn’t the only one who has no interest in being associated with the parade or its just lovely organizer. Boston native Chris Evans slammed the idea, and the parade was also disowned by Axe Body Spray. AXE BODY SPRAY. When even Axe turns on a straight guy, you know he messed up.

Meanwhile, the Straight Pride Parade continues to be great fodder for jokes on Twitter:

— Big Queer Cat (@CrownlessCat) June 4, 2019

floats at the straight pride parade include but are not limited to:

•jar of mayonnaise

•bowling ball

•can of bud light

•cargo shorts

•handgun

•camo hat

•crock pot

•tapout shirt

•slim jim

•mark wahlberg

•dartboard

•acoustic guitar

— ️‍ ️‍ (@YuckyTom) June 5, 2019

i made you a bingo card for the straight pride parade:

ugly footwear! untreated scalp issues! misapprehended bible quotes!

an actual swastika! Adam & Eve signage! patriotism!

a minority coming to violent harm! the troops! gun horniness!

— Anthony Oliveira (@meakoopa) June 4, 2019

sneak preview of the straight pride parade pic.twitter.com/TYfFPZwxOO

— David Tra (@enTralada) June 6, 2019

Straight guys already have a pride parade – it’s called NASCAR

— Whitney Cummings (@WhitneyCummings) June 5, 2019

Straight men already have a pride parade – it’s called the Senate (I have like 40 punch lines for this set up)

— Whitney Cummings (@WhitneyCummings) June 7, 2019

The secret password to the straight pride parade is “reverse racism”

— feminist next door (@emrazz) June 5, 2019

Straight pride parade Hey guys… if you’re in a parade, you’re gay.

— Chris D'Elia (@chrisdelia) June 5, 2019

This next one’s funnier if you visualize Billy Eichner yelling, “Move! I’m gay.”

— Brian (@PhillyGinger) June 4, 2019

And speaking of Billy Eichner, he’s willing to play along for the right price:

— billy eichner (@billyeichner) June 6, 2019

Some people looked at the positives:

— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) June 5, 2019

Say this much: "Straight Pride Parade" is a solid name. Clear, concise. Could be pithier, though.

Have you considered "White Walkers" or

— Glen Weldon (@ghweldon) June 4, 2019

if the straight pride parade happens, I might actually stand a chance on Xbox Live for a couple of hours

— Fred Delicious (@Fred_Delicious) June 5, 2019

But, just to be clear, a Straight Pride Parade is ridiculous because no one at a “straight pride” event has had to hide their straightness:

— RecSpec Inventor (@KrangTNelson) June 6, 2019

When you're straight and you finally get your pride parade pic.twitter.com/siTnpHpzzf

— no its becKy (@Kykyace) June 5, 2019

Straight Pride Parade. pic.twitter.com/AnnZMxCi2u

— Greg Hogben (@MyDaughtersArmy) June 6, 2019